Growing up, some would have called me a “daddy’s girl.” Although he was a busy pastor, I was often with him because my mother worked various shifts at the phone company. Whether it was a hospital visit, funeral, or community meeting, if I was not in school, I was with my father. As a result, I learned a lot about men as humans, not as an embodiment of socially prescribed roles, rules, and norms. From a very early age up to this present day, I watch his actions and use them as a blueprint for, not just men, but also for humanity. Here are some of those invaluable lessons I learned that are forever imprinted on my mind, heart, and soul.
1. Men are human; therefore, men cry.
2. Husbands and wives are teams with each contributing to the family based on what they do best.
3. Know how to take care of your car. Then, you’ll know if you’re getting a good deal at the mechanic.
4. God is at the center of everything. In all things, look to God.
5. If you’re going to preach, preach — don’t play!
6. Get an education. When you have it, no one can take it away from you.
9. Do what you can while you can so that when you can’t, you already did.
10. Why be good when you can be great?!
Dr. Kimberly J. Chandler is an Assistant Professor of Communication Studies at Xavier University of Louisiana. Her research interests are in gender and communication, specifically focusing on African American masculinities as well as Black women and identity negotiation. Dr. Chandler can be reached via email (DrKim@KimberlyChandler.com), Twitter (www.twitter.com/kimexsuperwoman) and Facebook (www.facebook.com/DrKimberlyChandler).
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